Wordle 215 5/6

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Is anybody else playing this? Yes, I am sucked into this game like so many other people.

I felt pretty confident when I started; getting the word in three tries felt pretty good! I assumed I would get better as I kept playing. I thought I would figure out the tricks and design a system in my brain to tackle this game with confidence each day.

And then came today*. I could not, for the life of me, figure out the word for the LONGEST time. I started putting in letters that “could” create words. I know that I don’t know ALL the words. I guess it’s a good thing that if it’s not a real word, it doesn’t “count against you**.”

Except for the fact that you are driving yourself crazy trying to find the right letters. One of my “Hail Mary” attempts was a word with a Z and an I. It was a real word, but still not the one.

Twenty minutes or years into typing in combinations that made Wordle shudder, I was sure that something was wrong with the app. “There is no combination of letters left that makes words,” I thought.

About to give up and/or do an Internet search for the correct answer, I punched in a combination of letters I KNEW was against the rules.

IT WAS THE RIGHT ANSWER.

I was relieved, yes, but also annoyed. See, the letter “O” was my first correct and correctly placed (aka Green) letter. “But Wordle doesn’t repeat letters,” I thought, “That’s the rule.”

Says who?

Yeah, NOBODY.

I assumed those were the rules. I had been silently berating the game’s creators for having this rule in place, keeping me from the dopamine rush I deserved from a correct answer, dammit! When I went against my (then unknown) self-created rules, I found success. Yeah, in the game (obviously, the winning word, ROBOT, contained two Os), but also in a bit of a life lesson:

Don’t always believe what you think.

When you take your self-talk as Truth, you may act on it, just like I did with this game. If I would have believed my first thoughts when I discovered a yoga teacher training was happening in my town (47 is too old to start teaching yoga; you are not in good enough shape***; you cannot afford it…), I would have been stuck. Just like I was in the game. I would have been bitter with the “game’s creator” (which, depending on your perspective, could be The Universe, God, Science…or a conspiracy of all of them together to make your life less fulfilling). I could have just continued on with my day-to-day, reflecting on what could have been…

Instead, I questioned my thoughts directly:

Too old? That’s not a thing when it comes to learning.****

Out of shape? Where did that come from? How did that make its way into my brain, especially since I’ve been celebrating bodies of every size? I must have been jarred loose from a dusty back corner. Into the bin it goes!

You can’t afford it? Now, while Suze Orman may have tsk-tsk’d at my choice, I knew that I could find a way. After all, I am a certified credit counselor (not active, but still). Until recently, I worked at a financial planning firm. I ran the numbers. And remembered another time I spent a whole lot of money, that time for a fabulous vacation. Did I regret it? No. And this was something else I knew I would not regret.

I have considered learning more about yoga, including how to teach yoga movement classes, for over 20 years. Whenever I would get close to taking that next step, I didn’t question “the rules” that my thoughts were feeding me and allowed more time to pass.

Until 2020.

I started my Yoga Teacher Training and persevered through a shift to online learning at the beginning of the pandemic. I kept going because my thoughts kept telling me: I LOVE THIS, my mind and heart responded…

NO LIES DETECTED.

Have a Powerful and Peaceful Day.

*Note: this was written last week.,

**I remember the feeling of someone ‘challenging’ my Scrabble word back in the day. THE NERVE!

*** Ugh, I’m annoyed at past me for judging myself based on twisted expectations of “good enough” connected with “body…”

****Old Dogs everywhere rejoice!